After a person has died, it is important that carers are supported to grieve.
For extra information, evidence and best practice please scroll down to the bottom of the page.
Bereavement Services for Greater Manchester
On this site, you can find out about support in your area and nationally, as well as advice for practical issues that losing a loved one may bring.
HOW TO HELP SOMEONE BEREAVEDIf you know someone who is grieving the death of someone close you may wonder how best to support them. Read on for some suggestions from Cruse Bereavement Care of what to say and do.
People who have been bereaved may want to talk about the person who has died. One of the most helpful things you can do is simply listen and give them time and space to grieve. Offering specific practical help, not vague general offers, can also be very helpful.
- Be there for the person who is grieving – pick up the phone, write a letter or an email, call by or arrange to visit.
- Accept that everyone grieves in their own way, there is no ‘normal’ way.
- Encourage the person to talk.
- Listen to the person.
- Create an environment in which the bereaved person can be themselves and show their feelings, rather than having to put on a front.
- Be aware that grief can take a long time.
- Contact the person at difficult times such as special anniversaries and birthdays.
- Mention useful support agencies such as Cruse Bereavement Care.
- Offer useful practical help.
- Avoid someone who has been bereaved.
- Use clichés such as ‘I understand how you feel’, ‘You’ll get over it’ or ‘Time heals’.
- Tell them it’s time to move on, they should be over it – how long a person needs to grieve is entirely individual.
- Be alarmed if the bereaved person doesn’t want to talk or demonstrates anger.
- Underestimate how emotionally draining it can be when supporting a grieving person. Make sure you take care of yourself too.
The service also has dedicated suicide bereavement practitioners to ensure that those bereaved or affected by suicide can speak to someone who will have a greater understanding of what they may be going through and help them access appropriate support.
You can find information about local bereavement services on the Support in your area page.
The service also provides support for professionals or those seeking advice for others.
If you would like to speak to someone in person, you can call Greater Manchester Bereavement Service:
OUR NORMAL OPENING HOURSCall us on 0161 983 0902 for help in finding the right support for you.
Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm (except bank holidays)
Or, you can email firstname.lastname@example.org
Carers Charters and Toolkits for Greater Manchester
Carers charter: https://www.gmhsc.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/Carers-Charter-FINAL.pdf
Greater Manchester working carer toolkit: https://sccdemocracy.salford.gov.uk/documents/s16450/Item%209%20-%20Appendix%20B%20-%20GM%20Working%20Carers%20Toolkit%201%20-%204%204%2019.pdf
End of Life Care in Greater Manchester for People With Dementia
Rules of Thumb Guide: https://dementia-united.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/sites/4/2021/01/03-UCL-Rules-of-Thumb-Guide-v14.0_PRINT-version.pdf
Greater Manchester syllabus for training on end of life care of those with dementia: https://dementia-united.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/sites/4/2021/01/2021-01-25-GM-Syllabus-v1.0.pdf
Manchester Macmillan Supportive and Palliative Care Community Service
Who is the service for?
Our service is usually for people whose illness means they are thought to be in the last year of life. However, we also provide care for people with longer life-limiting illness. We also provide support to families and carers. This is a really important part of supporting patients.
What does the service provide?
The service works from three hubs across Manchester so our teams work in their local neighbourhoods. The hubs are located in North, Central and South Manchester.
The teams provide support for adults facing life-limiting illness who are registered with a Manchester GP. The most common example is cancer, but our teams support patients with other conditions. We visit patients in their own home or care home. We also provide telephone support and advice when required.
The teams recognise that emotional, family, financial and spiritual concerns may be just as important to you as physical problems. We can:
- Provide treatment and advice to help manage any symptoms
- Offer practical advice and support to do the things that are important to you
- Support families and carers
- Signpost to other services including financial advice
- Support you to make choices and plan for your future.
Manchester Macmillan Supportive and Palliative Care Service Adult Referral Form: Macmillan Referral Form July final version
Advance Care Planning
Telephone: 0800 88 6678
Telephone: Call: 03000 683 000 between the hours of 08:30 – 17:30 Monday to Friday
Age UK Bereavement information
The death of someone close to us can be one of the hardest things we ever have to go through. Whether it’s expected or not, it can affect us in many different ways – and, unfortunately, we just have to cope the best we can. Grief is very personal and there’s no right or wrong way to deal with losing someone you love. But this guide explores how you might be feeling, why you might be feeling like that, and some of the things that could help – now and in the future. Age UK Bereavement leaflet
Research paper, Geriatric Psychiatry, 2013. Systematic review of grief reactions in carers of people with dementia: "The most consistent predictive factors of complicated (severe) and uncomplicated (normal) grief after death are being a spouse carer and experiencing depression. Depression is also strongly associated with increasing anticipatory grief. Factors that could be used to identify dementia carers who may need support during the grieving period to prevent the development of subsequent complicated grief and related comorbidity. Early identification of modifiable risk factors (i.e. decision to institutionalise, carer depression and carer burden), grieving in an open and adaptive manner before death and support provided by the same person before and after death may be helpful"
Best Practice Resources
Cruse, Bereaved by Dementia Project: - https://www.cruse.org.uk/about/our-work/bereaved-by-dementia-project/